Friday, May 29, 2015

2:40am and Me.

They say that if you're wide awake at 2 am, you're either lonely or in love. But I'm neither. I'm up because I have Alt-J and Guns N Roses on shuffle and I just can't seem to hit the pause button. 
There is also a blank canvas lying in front of me and dry paint brushes in my hand. Lyrics and blank canvases have a story behind them and I'm starting this blog to tell those only. 

I paint. Can't call myself an artist though. But I do have a story/explanations for almost every major artwork I've ever made. See I have fallen in love, not with a person but the way an artist's hands know how to continue on a piece when their mind is lost. The way that when an artist actually falls in love they will paint each and every curve of that person's body only in a way they can understand. And if you can't handle that, never ever let an artist fall in love with you.

I'm 16 and I know I don't even know 15% of how the actual world is. But I can tell you this, what I do know is because of bands and artists in the 60s-80s, not school because no assignment on determining the square root of the hypotenuse or proving LHS=RHS is going to help me actually learn what life out there is like
Frank Zappa once said " If you end up with a miserable life because you listened to your mom, your dad, your priest or some random guy on the television telling you how to do your shit, then you deserve it". This is the one quote that encouraged me to paint whatever I want and write whatever I want. I, like so many teenagers out there, was delusional when I found out I can make cool patterns out of colours. See I thought there was only one kind of art ( this was like 3 years ago). I think realizing there is no particular "kind of" art was the best moment. I realized I could actually put what I'm thinking onto pieces of processed wood pulp rather than following certain "rules" that my teacher taught me. I'm not here to criticize or encourage students to drop out of school, no, stay in school because people care more about the diploma on your wall than the thoughts that go through your mind at 3 am. 

Nothing more because  by the time that I finish writing, it'll probably be 3:30. 
I am seriously here to talk if anyone can relate to what I wrote. 



  1. I cannot describe to you exactly how much I could relate to this post. I really liked the quote that you mentioned. I truly believe that I can't be cribbing about my life if I'm the one handling it.

    I came to a similar realization like you. I realized that there are no rules to poetry and free speech. I own my words when I write them. And good poetry does not mean rhyming words. Whatever touches your heart is good poetry.

    The way you feel about colors, I feel that way about words. I enjoy knowing that if one day my emotions fail me, words won't. I'm sure it's the same for you.

    I'm glad to have found someone like me out there!


    1. I fell in love with each and every word you wrote. I have never talked/met someone who understands exactly what I'm feeling. People say they get what I'm saying but it really takes a person who has been in the same situation to understand it completely.

      I'm so glad you commented, it really gives me a satisfaction that there are people like me out there.